Wednesday, December 9, 2015

Chapter 8, Something Shifty In Ajiga City part 2

(Gaesa) "Ooookay. Payment for us getting rid of this changeling will be 2000 rods and a penthouse flat for six."

"Six? There's only four of you."

"You missed the ghoston twins. They're out exploring."

"Okay then. It's a deal."

Cut to outside. They woke up Torogae and explained the situation. Afterwards they all went around the city looking for Dek and Trek. Torogae was silently fuming and muttering swear words while they were doing this. (btw all ghoston names rhyme. I don't understand it either.)When they found the ghostons they were outside a mystic's sanctum. When the twins were brought up to speed Ironok looked at the entrance to the sanctum. 

"Hey guys I'll catch up with ya. There's something I need to do."

"Okay."

Ironok entered the sanctum. He looked around and saw an old satauwra sitting at the far end of the room. Now you may be asking, "What is a satauwra?" They're thin humanoid creatures with hooved, double jointed legs. The hooves are completely symmetrical and branch off into four points. The sataura looked up at him with a mystical look in her eyes.

"Ironok, I've been expecting you."

Ironok suddenly got on the defensive.

"How do you know my name?"

"Because it's etched in obvious letters on your tail club. The I've been expecting you thing is just something I do to spook people."

"Oh. Really? I forgot that existed. Anyway, I need you to take a look at something. I've been studying it on the voyage here and I can't discern anything from it."

He took out the specimen jar that contained the white gel.

"So what's your name?"

"Quarts. Yeah I can take a look. I'll send a spirit if I find anything out. By the way, could you put up the closed sign on the way out?"

"Okay."

Ironok handed her the jar and slithered out. He then put up the sign and went to go find the others. He found them outside the museum.

"So, did anyone find anything out?"

Dek piped up, "Trek and I didn't. Gaesa wouldn't let us into the room that got vandalized and damaged."

"For good reason too," Gaesa later told Ironok, "The graffiti actually made for some really lewd images."





to be continued.............................................














   
    

Thursday, October 29, 2015

Chapter 8, Something Shifty In Ajiga City

"Well, here ye are. Welcome ta Ajiga, Glashlaklfla's largest port city. Ye need us again just use this horn."

 Captain handed them a horn carved with wiry ancient symbols. The raft then fell through a hole in the water below it which then closed up.

(Trek) "Dek, can't say we've been here before."

"Nope. No we haven't."

Cut to four of them in a tavern. Dek and Trek were out exploring the city.

(Niaemal) "So, what now?"

(Gaesa) "I don't know. Didn't think we'd get this fa........................................... sleep........................dart................................

Gaesa fell over sideways and his head landed in a bowl of stew. The other three were soon knocked out with sleep darts. This was because of something that happened earlier.......

1/2 hour earlier...................................

As the group was leaving the pier two people were spying on them from behind a storage building. We now cut to city hall. Several messengers were standing nervously outside an ornate door.

"So who's goin' to tell him?"

 "Not me."

"Me neither."

"I'll do it.", one spoke up.

"Good luck rookie, you'll need it."

He went in through the door. After a few seconds the door was then blasted backward by a very loud WHAT!!!!!!!!!!! The poor sap who had gotten his job only yesterday was thrown into the opposite wall. Then another messenger entered. 

"Sir, the spy team saw what looked a gang of mercs."

"Bring them here then."

  
1/2 hour later

"This is it then? There's only four of them?"

"Yes sir. That's all of them."

The four who were knocked out were sitting in chairs.

"Well wake them up. Except the cybull. I hear their tempers can be quite explosive.

They were all woken up except for Torogae. When they all managed to find their bearings they saw a large blue mandra in front of them. A mandra is a large, wide, snake like species of Augarian. They look like big pythons with short, clawed arms near the head. Ironok instantly recognized this particular mandra as a school rival. A steely glint came into his eye.

"Orobis." he said in a low, dangerous, hissing, and menacing tone.

"Ironok." the mandra, now identified as Orobis, said in the same tone of voice.

(Ironok) "You've gotten on well. Mayor of a city, eh?"

"Yes. Anyway!"  his voice turned to a businesslike tone. "I have a job offer for the four of you."

(Gaesa) "Depends on what it is. By the way why did you knock us out? I've got stew in my hair. You know you could have just sent someone down to get us, right?"

"Um, yes. But last time I did that, three city blocks came crashing down. It took a couple of months to repair everything. You have no idea how much paperwork I had to fill out, not to mention....... Well, I'm getting ahead of myself. There's a changeling running around causing havoc. It's already inflicted serious damage on the natural history museum and vandalized the temple at the edge of the city. I'm hiring you to get rid of it."

(Ironok) "What, gettin' too fat and lazy to do it yourself?"

"I guess I have been eating a lot lately. Mostly dead rodents. But there have been other sources of nutrition."

"Ok, just try not to raise the rating."

"What? I was talking about ambris ore. What did you think I was............. Oh."

"Yeah."







to be continued............................................................................................







Monday, October 5, 2015

chapter 7, A seafarer's tale, hunt for the sea blade! part 5

"Boys. When I say go, we're gathering as much of the treasure as we can into bags and running for the raft like death was on our heels. GO!"

That is exactly what they did, for they felt that death was indeed at their heels when half way to the raft they heard a ghostly roar.

(Silent) "Karanesh?"

(Captain) "Most likely."

They had just reached the raft and were about to launch the raft when a shape appeared over a mountain.

(Captain)"Wait what??!!! He's a bone drake? The legend always describes him as a squid thing that breathes lasers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Karanesh landed on the shore.

"Wait, what? They're still saying I'm a squid?"

 "All the time."

"Uuuuuuhg, sweet Creator. WHY DO I EVEN BOTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Everyone was knocked off their feet when he shouted this. Karanesh then went on to explain that the Augarian legend writers guild has been adhering to a lot of stereotypes for many hundreds of years. 

"I've talked to them about this before, but they just role their eyes and go, 'Shorry dude but dragonsh are really out of plashe in she shtoriesh. They belong in medieval fantashiesh kidnapping prinsheshesh and shleeping on pilesh of treashure.' They've been impossible ever since they discovered that half the dragons from Gaia (Gaia is what Augarians call Earth btw.) use stolen treasure as beds. Plus, it gets really annoying when people mix ya up with Cthulhu."

(Captain) "Well maybe we can make a deal. We'll go attempt to make them all see reason, in return for ye letting us go, with the sword and treasure."

"Deal."

We now return to the inn.

"The end."

"That's it then?"

"Yeh. Now fer listenin' to me tale, ye and yer little group get free passage on me raft."

So eve- "Hey narrator?"

What Ironok?

"Could you just end the chapter here? We don't need some sort of monologue about how everything worked out."

Fine.




to be continued..............................................................................................................















              

Monday, September 28, 2015

Legendary Augarian Weapon: Aqualai The Sea Blade

NAME: Aqualai

WEAPON TYPE: cutlass/trident/axe/rapier

LEGEND: Gives user full control over saltwater. Is the sword of the sea Kairathu.

HOW TO FIND: (It is in the light dimension so go there first.)
step 1: manage to procure the right treasure map from a vendor
step 2: follow the map to the correct island
step 3: take sword off of pedestal

(WARNING: taking the sword will awaken an insanely powerful dragon)

Thursday, September 24, 2015

Legend File: the tide eater

Name: Karanesh, The Tide Eater

Species: Bone Drake
A bone drake is a species of dragon that are normally seen on islands and shores. In short, it's a sea dragon. Bone drakes are one of the strangest types of dragons in that their skins aren't covered in scales. Instead, they grow a strange armor made of bone.

Power's: the standard breath attack that every dragon is known for, this time lightning, 
is able to create a large fog bank, and has razor sharp wing edges


 Legend: He was the one to bring down the sea Kairathu. This granted him the title of tide eater.



Monday, September 21, 2015

chapter 7, A seafarer's tale, hunt for the sea blade! part 4

(snoring)

"Okay, what's goin' on?! Ye both just fell asleep!"

(Gaesa) "Well can you blame us? You've been going on for 3 hours now!! Can ya make this quick? I'd really like to get some sleep right about now."

"Alright I'll skip past the angry wind spirit, the quest to find a magical orb to bring that aga bat back to life, and the time flax got so paranoid that he blew up an entire pirate ship thereby gaining status as a Kairathu."

(Ironok) "Wait, you keep mentioning that word, Kairathu. What does that mean?"

"I don't know much. Only that they were strange beings who could bend certain elements to their wills. That be about it though."

Back to the story...........

(Silent) "Cove. Dead ahead."

"Aright I'll bring er' around!"

He jumped to the wheel and gave it a spin. The raft spun around at high speed until it came to rest within the cove.

(First) Captain ye almost tossed us all overboard!!!!!"

"Well fine. YE try ta parallel park this thing."

Flax turned to Silent.

"Ye know that wind spirit really should have picked a better emissary than an aga bat."

"Aye"

(Captain) "Alright, lets make landing and search the island!"

(First) "Or just go into the cave with a skull over the entrance."

There was indeed a cave onshore with a giant skull over the entrance.

"Oh.......... thanks fer pointin' that out. Makes things easier."

Everyone headed ashore and went inside the cave. They all stared with wonder at the treasure inside.

"Well First, this proof enough?"

"This could be anything. We don't know that the sea blade is in here or if it even exists."

"Then what's that weird sword over there doing on a pedestal?"

"I stand corrected."

Captain walked over and picked up the sword. It was just then that Flax noticed something.

"Captain? Ye might want to look up."

He looked up and saw writing on the wall.

"Whoever claims this ancient blade shall in turn awaken the tide eater. Well @#$%."

to be continued.................................................................................................................


















Wednesday, September 2, 2015

chapter 7, A seafarer's tale, hunt for the sea blade! part 3

NOTE: Stone light is a very rare but extremely useless crystal that does nothing but sit there looking pretty. However it will get you quite a bit of rods if you sell a shard to a jeweler.

Cut to the crew at sea.

"Captain do ye even know which way ta go?!"

 "Of course I do. I found a map to the place in the storage area. Not too sure what it was doin' there though."

(cut back to harbor)

"Well Mez we're all set."

"Yeah Pez. Just two adventurers on the voyage of a lifetime to find treasure."

"The ship is ready, the crew will be here in 1 minute. We're ready to go."

"So Pez do you have the map?"

"Oh Yeah, I left it over on this.................................................storage..............................barrel."

Pez turns around and sees a bunch of really burly sailors walking up the pier.

"Mez, I think we're about to get lynched."

(back at sea)

Everyone heard a loud scream. It was then that Flax started freaking out.

"Oh no, a banshee. We're all going to die soon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"(sighs) Flax, we are not going to die. Silent! Get down here we're reviewin' the map."

He spreads the map out on a crate.

"So if we set an-" screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech

"So if we set-" he is again interrupted by a screeching aga bat.

"Oh fer the love a-" He pulls out his crossbow then twang, thud, splash.

(Flax) "Captain, ye've doomed us all."

"Flax, that's with albatross. Not aga bats."

(Silent) "Raft. Over that way."

First walked over to where Silent indicated and pulled out a spy glass.

"Well first?"

"Aye, tis' a raft. But it be................ made of........................ Bones???"

Captain walked over and pulled out his own spyglass.

"Huh. It is made of bones. Ye don't see that every day."

When the raft caught up to them the crew was astonished to see that it was crewed by a bunch of skelechrome. A skelechrome is what happens when the skeleton of an augarian takes a dip in molten metal, thereby giving it a life of its own.

"Hello there!", said the lead one. "Could you give us directions to the nearest port?"

The reason the crew was so astonished was because skelechrome are usually feral, predatory, and not nearly intelligent enough to talk let alone man a raft.

"Uhhhh. Try goin' that way fer a couple miles."

"Thanks!"

(Flax)  "What just happened?"

"No clue Flax. No clue."




To be continued................................................................................................. 

































Monday, July 13, 2015

chapter 7, A seafarer's tale, hunt for the sea blade! part 2

When we last left off an old seafarer was telling a story. This is that story.

The raft was almost ready. The sail was unfurled and everyone was in place. Rafts on Augaria are more advanced than Earth rafts and actually have cabins, a mast/sail, and a crow's nest. They are still not as good as ships though. Now maybe I should describe the crew. The old seafarer was the captain (right now he doesn't have the sword) who's name was coincidentally, Captain. Now of course he was just called Captain seeing as it would sound stupid to call him captain Captain. There's also the first mate First McGhee. He was wearing a brown overcoat and steal tipped boots. He was also very skeptical and had two cutlass's strapped to his sides. Then there was Flax Jordan, the deck hand. He was wearing metal gauntlets and had a bolt pistol in a holster. Now he was also very superstitious and as such his outfit was covered in amulets and good luck charms. Seriously, you name it. From dream catchers to a lucky piece of stone light. The last member of the crew was Silent Jackson. He was tall, muscled, and lived up to his name in the fact that he only talked when he had to. There was also a giant war hammer secured to his back.

"Captain this is suicide."

"Do ye even know what we're after First?"

"No. But I do know tis goin' ta be one of yer wild goose chase treasure hunts. What are we even looking for this time?"

"I be glad ye asked. Narrator?!"

Long ago, a powerful deity used a strange sword to bend the seas to his will. It seemed he could not be defeated, for when someone challenged him he would strike their ships with mighty waves and sink them. He was finally bested by the tide eater Karanesh. It is said that before he died he sent the blade to a secret island that held what he took from defeated ships.

"That be how the myth goes anyway."

"Exactly me point Captain. Its a myth, it doesn't exist."

"That's what ye said about the lemon flavored kraken. What flavor was that kraken when we all caught and ate it?"

"(sigh) Lemons."

"Exactly. Now tis highly unlikely that he was a deity seeing as if he was he couldn't have died."

"Now yer finally startin' to see sense.", he said relieved.

"More likely he was one of the ancient Kairathu."

Cue anime pratfall.

"This is getting more farfetched by the second. First deities with magical swords, then hidden islands full of treasure, and now demigods?!!!"

''Aye. Now lets shove off!   


to be continued....................................................................................................












Tuesday, June 23, 2015

chapter 7, A seafarer's tale, hunt for the sea blade!

When we last left off the group was heading to Glashlaklfla. Now they'd been traveling for a while now, and along the way Dek realized something.

"Hey Gaesa? Isn't Glashlaklfla on an island?"

"Yeah, why?"

"We don't exactly have enough rods to hire a ship."

"We could always hire a raft."

(Everyone else.) "A raft? Seriously? Sounds cheap." Niaemal just face palmed.

(Fast-forward to a port town Inn.) Everyone except Gaesa and Ironok were in beds. The other two however were at the bar.

(bartender) "So can I get you two anything?"

(Gaesa) "Yeah. Two ales and a cheap raft to Glashlaklfla."

"A raft?"

 (Ironok) "We're a bit low on dough if ya know what I mean."

They went and sat down at a table.

(Gaesa) "So when we actually get there, there's the question of where to crash."

"Lets just disintegrate that bridge when we come to it."

They were about to head up to their rooms when they were suddenly pulled to the side by an old guy in a mariner's getup (you know, old blue frayed patchwork jacket with waaaaaaay too many pockets?). There was a crossbow in a holster on his hip and a weird sword slung across his back.

"I hear ye be lookin' fer passage teh Glashlaklfla (thunder outside)."

"Um. Yes?"

"Twas two months ago when we set sail. The air was fresh and full of salt. The sky was-",  just then Ironok interrupted.

"Dude, are you seriously reciting a sea tale? Like, right now?"

"Yeh. Now as I was sayin' the sky was clear and the wind was brisk."

Ironok got tired of the monologing and looked up.

"Hey narrator? Can you just cue the ripple dissolve already?!"


To be continued......................................................
















Thursday, June 11, 2015

chapter 6, spelunking in insanity part 3 (strange........... cantalope) wait, what???



When we last left off, a lever was being pulled. The bridge started extending slowly towards them while making that weird sound of sliding stone.

"Well guys looks like all ya have to do now is wait."

So they waited........................................ and waited.................................................... and waited...................

                                                                 (5 hours later)

and waited.......................................... and waited................................................ and waited..............
Everyone was asleep by this point because the bridge was barely halfway there.

                                                             (3 more hours later)

"Finally!"

Everyone except the Ghostons were lying in a tangled heap on the bridge. 

 (Ironok) "I can't believe it took 8 hours.

"Cfff you gt yrr hf hhh mof hofocae?"

Torogae apparently had his hoof in Niaemal's mouth. When they got untangled everyone went across the bridge and through a stone door. I'd like to say that the first thing they were aware of was the hugeness, but it was really the noise. It was SO loud that they had to close the apparently sound proof  door immediately after it was opened. Because it was so loud they had to sit in a circle and contemplate how to get through without going insane. Gaesa asked the first question.

"So........ Anyone have any ideas?"

Niaemal spoke up.

"We could use these no noise ear plugs."

They all decided this was the best option so they put them on, opened the door back up, and went inside. NOW what took them in was the hugeness. Dek was astounded by the shear size.

"Yeah.... this could take awhile."

"WHAT!?"

"I SAID THIS COULD TAKE AWHILE!"

So they went down into the canyon. Now they couldn't hear each other so it was very hard to communicate. Gaesa dashed over to a wall and did some hand signals. Unfortunately, no one new what they meant. Suddenly the ground started to shake. This sent Ironok into hypothesis mode.

"(Weird, Augaria doesn't get earthquakes.)"

A ghoston darted in front of  them and made signs to follow him. Fortunately everyone knew what this meant so they followed him into a hut that was built into the wall. On the way however, Gaesa was grumbling something about hand signals. When they entered the ghoston took out his own ear plugs from his ears and motioned for them to do the same.

"Okay can anyone hear me? We good? Okay."

Ironok inquired, "Hey, is your name Clevora Medohss?"

"It was," he says darkly, "but now it's Clek!", he says, perking up instantly.

"Oookay. So yeah we're down here because there's been an outbreak of mucelo-clenka."

"So you need me to cure it. Okay I can do that. But you guys need a way out of here. Didn't ya notice the shaking? There's a baselar (dun dun duh) down here!"

"A....... baselar? (dun dun duh)"

"Yes, a baselar (dun dun duh)."

Torogae was confused.

"Wait, what the @#%& is a baselar? (dun dun duh)"

"A giant serpentine creature with four tongues and sixty two stomachs."

Ironok inquired: "Wait, won't it have gone insane by now?"

"No.......... Baselars (dun dun duh) don't really have ears.......... Or vocal cords.......... Or a sense of humor for that matter."

(Gaesa)  "Well either way we'll have to kill it to get out of here."

"Why's that?"

Gaesa pointed out the window to show it lurking around the entrance. It was massive, twenty five times the length of a school bus and taller than an elephant. Along the spine were metal ridges, and along the sides were fin like projections. 

"Oh."

They all sat in a circle yet again and contemplated their best plan of attack. Ironok turned to Clek.

"So what do you know about baselars? (dun dun duh)"

"All I know is that it's skin is completely invulnerable to attacks."

(Gaesa) "So basically go for the eyes and the mouth."

(Niaemal) "Ok, I have an idea, but there's only a 6% chance it'll work."

"Well better than nothing."

"Ok you guys just have to distract it, I'll take care of the rest."

So with that in mind they all put their head phones back on and went out of the door. 

 and now................................................................................................. cue....boss........BATTLE!!!!!!!  

                                                 Subteranian Armored Snake

                                                               Baselar  

 Niaemal circled around to a rock outcropping and hid there, while the others ran at the giant snake. It tried hitting them with poisonous projectiles from it's mouth, luckily everyone just dodged them. Back to niaemal. 

"(Ok I just have to charge this up.)"

Back with the others. Gaesa had just managed to cut off one of the monster's tongues. Torogae then decided to take it up a notch.

"MINAETAURAHSS", and he then transformed into his humanoid form and was able to cut off two more tongues.
Back to Niaemal.

"(Ok it's fully charged. Now I just need a good shot.)"

Back with the others.
They had just gotten the last tongue cut off. The creature thrashed about screetching in pain and the noise was so loud it could be heard even with no noise ear plugs. Ironok was sent into hypothosis mode again.

"(I thought it wasn't supposed to have vocal cords.)"

Ironok was right in this reguard however what he didn't notice was that the baselar's (dun dun duh) eyes were glowing blue. Nor did he or anyone else notice the strange, froglike fifth tongue that was hiding inside the mouth. The giant serpent then noticed Niaemal on the rocks. The sharpshooter was standing up to get a good shot. The monster then shot out its 
fifth tongue. 

"(Ok Niaemal, wait for the right time, then let'r rip.)"

The tongue was almost to Niaemal when the sharpshooter let it loose.

"KAIA DREO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Chaos blast)"

The large beam incinerated its tongue and went down its throat causing the giant snake to blow up like a balloon. Then it blew up. Like the kaboom kind of blew up. The aftermath was kinda disgusting because there was bits of snake everywhere. It was then that Ironok noticed a white blob trying to get away. Luckily he managed to catch it in a specimen jar. Fast forward back to the surface.

"So Clek, think you'll able to help these guys out?"

"I should be able to handle it."

"Well see ya later then."

As the six companians went down the road from Random Out of Place Tile Boulivard Niaemal had an idea.

"Hey what if we did this kinda stuff for living?"

"What, like merks?"

"Yeah."

"Sounds like fun. We can set up base in Glashlaklfla."







To be continued........................

































                                                              

Monday, February 9, 2015

chapter 6, spelunking in insanity part 2 (hero...... kaira........) wait, what was that?



"Well this is a real pickle. Did not see that rope trap. Or the collapsing cliff."

The "pickle" he's talking about is the fact that when they finally got to dead drop ravine the ledge they were on collapsed when Gaesa activated a rope trap. They are all now hanging above the ravine. Gaesa is hanging upside down by his foot. The others except for the Ghostons were hanging on for dear life from his cape.

(Gaesa) "Hey Niaemal? Is your hand okay? It doesn't look too good."

"Yeah it's fine, it's just gone purple from hanging on too long.", He says sarcastically.  

"Well, can't you just use your other hand?"

"I can't do that because my other hand is a FREAKIN CANNON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Oookay forget I asked."

(Ironok) "Hass habahi a hoof hifea."

You're probably asking, 'why is he talking like that?'. Well since Ironok doesn't have any limbs he has to hold on with his mouth. The Ghostons, by the way, were looking around on the opposite ledge.

"Hey guys? I'm not sure if this helps, but Dek and I found a lever that extends a bridge reaching exactly under where you guys are. Pretty convenient if you ask me."

(Torogae) WELL THEN PULL THE @#$% THING!!!!!!!!!



To be continued..............




Monday, January 26, 2015

Mystery file: Kairathu

What follows is a passage from the journal of  professor Remblat Frizzlefrazz.



Tuesday, 6th of apoross, Werewak region, northeastern hemisphere.




Have discovered something in my travels. It seems to be an ancient temple of the pyramid styling. There is a large squarish entrance at the bottom which is lined with giant stone obelisks. I'm inside it now, many strange creatures are carved on the walls. Warriors breaking mountains, Aga bats with wings made of fire etc. I think this is what I'm looking for. The Ancient vault of the Kairathu. It seems the ancient Waks revered these mysterious creatures as deities. If they were that powerful it's no wonder they were seen as deities. The carving in the back is the strangest, depicting the six most powerful of these creatures the Kaigonbiria. Two twins, a serpent with a book, a flaming beast, a mage, and a warrior with dragon wings. Anyway there's a door here. I'm going to head in, d d d  deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer.........................
(static)

Just so you know, this is an audio journal that was being relayed to a speaker and written down in an actual book. No one knows what happened to professor Frizzlefrazz however many claim that zombie corpses of the ancient waks brainwashed him so he would sell hair spray.